jawbreaker or die RSS

when i was 9,
i started one of these ridiculous 1-lb jawbreakers. it sat half-licked in a plastic baggie in my nightstand for a year before someone made me throw it away. not this time. i vow to finish this jawbreaker...
even if it kills me.

Archive

Jul
5th
Sat
permalink
Session 2 After a few days of recovery, my tongue and I got back to work on Thursday. I’ve been storing the jawbreaker in a plastic baggie in the fridge. Conclusion: a cold jawbreaker is actually 100x tastier than one served at room temperature. I’m also amazed at how much progress can be made in 15 miutes. My strategy to move the jawbreaker and leave my tongue stationary wasn’t very effective or fun, so I’m now licking cautiously and using my lips. Fairly certain it looks mildly PG-13. Updates are going to be sparse for the next week. I’m doing a 7-day cleanse (no sugar). On the plus side, by the time I start back up, my new digital kitchen scale will have arrived (thanks to Mat for the idea). Soon we’ll know just how much weight 15 minutes of licking shaves off!

Session 2

After a few days of recovery, my tongue and I got back to work on Thursday. I’ve been storing the jawbreaker in a plastic baggie in the fridge. Conclusion: a cold jawbreaker is actually 100x tastier than one served at room temperature. I’m also amazed at how much progress can be made in 15 miutes. My strategy to move the jawbreaker and leave my tongue stationary wasn’t very effective or fun, so I’m now licking cautiously and using my lips. Fairly certain it looks mildly PG-13.

Updates are going to be sparse for the next week. I’m doing a 7-day cleanse (no sugar). On the plus side, by the time I start back up, my new digital kitchen scale will have arrived (thanks to Mat for the idea). Soon we’ll know just how much weight 15 minutes of licking shaves off!

Jul
1st
Tue
permalink

Making a Jawbreaker Takes FOUR DAYS!

Other interesting factoids…

- a golf ball-sized jawbreaker has 10 layers of colored sugar (see 4:41)

- powdered carnuba wax gives the jawbreaker its shiny finish

- an oil (soya palm sterine) is used to make sure the candy won’t stick to your teeth.

- a jawbreaker is 90% sugar and 10% awesome

Jun
30th
Mon
permalink
session 1  25 minutes of intermittent licking last night. the first dozen licks were a challenge. there’s a fairly rough texture on the outside. but my mouth kept at it and soon that sweet sweet, color-changing jb revealed itself. went to bed feeling awesome and accomplished and hopeful until i woke up this morning with a sore tongue. no joke, i pulled my tongue muscle. lesson learned: from now on, stationary licking only. I’m a gonna hold my tongue steady and move the jawbreaker.

session 1 

25 minutes of intermittent licking last night. the first dozen licks were a challenge. there’s a fairly rough texture on the outside. but my mouth kept at it and soon that sweet sweet, color-changing jb revealed itself. went to bed feeling awesome and accomplished and hopeful until i woke up this morning with a sore tongue. no joke, i pulled my tongue muscle. lesson learned: from now on, stationary licking only. I’m a gonna hold my tongue steady and move the jawbreaker.

Jun
29th
Sun
permalink
And so it begins… I found this badboy in a candy shop on the side of Highway 1 in Bodega Bay, CA. I’m going to finish this thing no matter what. However long it takes. Whatever it takes.
And so it begins… I found this badboy in a candy shop on the side of Highway 1 in Bodega Bay, CA. I’m going to finish this thing no matter what. However long it takes. Whatever it takes.